I Love You, But I Don’t Even Know You
An approach to make you kinder
I can confidently say that I love you. Yet, I’ve never even met you, let alone know you.
Why is it that people are so afraid of saying “I love you”?
One could blame Hollywood for making it seem like confessing your love is the biggest deal in the world.
Or, you could blame the fact that you were probably not told you were loved enough growing up.
Regardless, learning to love others no matter what and being able to openly state it will change the depths of your relationships, openness, and levels of happiness.
Let me explain!
A quick journey of love
With the exception of my mom, I went years without telling anyone I loved them.
It took me close to 12 years before I told my brothers, dad, girlfriend or friends that I loved them. This was partly because I put too much meaning into the word and partly because I didn’t really know what it meant.
This all changed when I met a certain girl.
This girl badly wanted me to say I loved her, but I didn’t know how. When she asked me who I loved, I wasn’t able to say it about anyone aside from my mom.
I always answered with “I don’t know”.
Over a few months, she eventually got me to say it about my friends, family and others, and eventually about her too.
From then on, I started saying “I love you” more often.
Now, I basically tell everyone I love them.
And if I don’t say it, I still do my best to treat them with love, even if I don’t know them.
The result?
I am much happier, have an easier time connecting with people, and am able to build deep relationships fairly easily.
Why you should love everyone
It’s safe to say that 99% of people you meet don’t have bad intentions.
Yes, some of them may be interested in you for different reasons, and some of them may not want to talk to you, but they don’t wish you ill.
Most people want to be loved - they need to be loved.
And most people want to love.
We all need this connection between one another, and yet, because of previous damages or misplaced conceptions, we block it off.
Love brings us all together.
Love is the greatest feeling of all.
Love is a universal language.
Give every single person the love we all desire, and watch what happens.
Practice makes perfect
Approaching others with this mindset will seem intimidating at first. After all, who knows how they will react? They might think you’re a weirdo (oh no!).
Most of this fear comes from being afraid this love will not be returned.
We’ve become so used to giving love only to those who love us back that to love someone without love being returned can be terrifying.
Once you get over this though, you’ll openly be able to love everyone, and it will be beautiful.
It won’t be easy, but with consistent practice and constantly reframing your mindset, you can do it.
Closing thoughts
Before changing my mindset to approach everyone with love, I was a lot more miserable, and I struggled to connect with others.
Everything changed when I changed my approach.
Think about how you treat those you love. You tend to accept their flaws, want the best for them, and have a different openness towards them and understanding of them.
But, for whatever reason, if you don’t know someone, you immediately judge them or dismiss them if they aren’t perfect.
Stop this approach, choose love, and watch how happiness follows.
Thanks for reading