A Real-Life Guide to Cutting Toxic People Out of Your Life (How & Why)
Your “friend” is holding you back
You are a combination of the people you spend the most time with.
This is a classic old phrase that you are sick of hearing, but not only is it true, but it is also more relevant than ever.
Your time is precious. Your life is precious.
Not only are you wasting your time with the wrong people, but you also are hurting your life’s potential.
You are doing yourself a disservice by not cutting out these people.
It’s time to rid your life of toxic people… for real this time.
How to identify the “toxic” ones
It’s easier with some people than with others. There are certain individuals who anytime you are around them, you feel drained and upset.
You know, those people who always manage to bring out the worst in you?
A few hours after you leave their side, you start wondering, “What got into me?”.
Okay, so those are the obvious ones.
But, unfortunately, toxic people aren’t always obvious.
Others gently hold you down with them.
It could be their lack of motivation or lack of belief in humanity that makes them hold you back from fulfilling your potential.
It’s poisonous to be around them, but it is so subtle that you fail to see it.
The easiest way to spot them is to look for who isn’t bringing you up.
It’s often black and white. If they don’t bring you up, it is because they are bringing you down.
The right people fill you with energy, motivation, and words of reason that improve your mindset.
Settling for less is inviting toxic people into your life.
Why you should cut them out
Life is short, and you need to make the best of it. If you agree, you shouldn’t be wasting your energy on those who don’t make your life better.
Loved ones, positive people, motivated people and funny people make your life better.
Negative, boring, whiny and hateful people make your life worse.
Life will be miserable if you are surrounded by these kinds of people. You will be unmotivated and drained regularly. This prevents you from being your best.
If you have any goals or the desire to be happy, you need to cut the bad people out of your life.
Your well-being matters.
You matter.
How to cut these people out of your life
It’s difficult to cut toxic people out of your life, especially if they’ve been around you for years.
A lot of the bad people in your life need you because your positivity and good energy make them feel better. They’re leaching onto you.
You have two options if you want to cut them out.
Simply stop spending time on them. Stop talking to them, stop hanging out with them and stop giving them your energy. No notice is required.
Sit them down and let them know that they do not make you better. Although they are enjoyable at times, the majority of the time they bring you down and you want to protect yourself. If things continue you will have to stop spending time with them.
Now, you may immediately think about how option 2 will hurt their feelings.
Real friends understand that your energy and time matters. They may be hurt at first, but they’ll eventually understand.
Toxic people will hold this against you forever, in which case, clearly this was the right decision.
If they’re upset with you for wanting to protect yourself, then they are not a good person and it is best to cut them out anyway.
You will have the occasion where this person was indeed a good friend who is going through a hard time and this is why they have been toxic lately.
Your conversation with them may have given them the awakening they needed to change or to go get professional help.
Either way, you are doing what is best for you, and at the end of the day, you need to prioritize yourself.
If your honesty helps them too, even better. Honesty can save yourself time, them from continuing down this toxic path and maybe even your relationship together.
How your life will improve
Removing negativity in your life feels like a weight lifted off your shoulders. You have more time, and energy and your whole mindset shifts.
Over time, this change compounds and your life feels easier and more pleasant.
A positive mindset can create new opportunities, attract good people, and improve your health.
You don’t realize these things when you are dragged down by toxic people. Your negative state becomes so normal to you that you assume everyone feels the same.
This change is one of the best changes you can make to your life.
How to find the right people
The biggest reason people fail to cut the toxic people out of their lives is that they are afraid they will not be able to replace them.
Instead, they continue to hang around the same people instead of taking a chance to change their lives.
So, how do you find the right people?
The first change you have to make is cutting out the bad.
If you are surrounded by bad people, it will be hard to attract good ones. And if you are lucky enough to attract a few, they’ll be turned away when they see who you hang out with.
Once you’ve taken the leap and cut out the bad, you need to start going where good people hang out.
It’s as simple as that.
Are you trying to build a gym habit and want good workout buddies instead of your lazy friends? Get a personal trainer, join a sports team or join a boxing gym.
Do you want to surround yourself with successful business people? Join networking clubs, go to conferences and seminars, and find out what activities they participate in.
Pretty logical, right?
Right.
Regardless of who you want to surround yourself with, you’re going to have to put yourself out there and always be kind.
To wrap it up
Cutting toxic people out of your life is one of the greatest life hacks. While it can be hard to execute, it’s something that will leave you wondering why you waited so long to do it.
By following this guide and taking a risk to upgrade your circle with good people, your life will improve exponentially over time.
No matter what you do, remember to love yourself first. Self-love attracts good people and helps you prioritize yourself.
Naturally, that will lead you to cutting out toxic people regardless.
Thanks for reading