What I’m Doing to Maximize My Happiness Over The Next 5 Years
A simple approach to building a happy life
Happiness, like nearly everything else in life, can be maximized by approaching it intelligently.
While happiness often happens randomly, uncontrollably or accidentally, there are things you can do to help these happy moments come more frequently.
Essentially, you can skew the odds in your favour.
I’ve been working on this for a few years, and so far, I’ve found that I can do this by analyzing and organizing my life in 3 ways.
The past, the present and the future.
The Past
This is a dangerous place to spend too much time. It is easy to end up in a doom-loop of shame, sadness or anger. All of these emotions are caused by things which have already happened.
But, like any history, your past is important to study too.
We study history to learn from the mistakes of others, or in this case, ourselves. We do this to avoid repeating mistakes that can cause great pain in the future.
Of course, the fewer of these mistakes you repeat, the easier it will be to find happiness.
So, how do we properly analyze the past?
Some recommendations:
Journaling
Talk to a therapist
Sit there with your thoughts
Sitting with your thoughts is the most underrated way. You would be surprised how much you can figure out by doing absolutely nothing for an hour.
That’s why people hate being bored.
They end up getting stuck in the past, and if they aren’t comfortable with their past, well, they won’t like being bored.
Unfortunately, if you aren’t comfortable or at peace with your past, you will struggle to be in the present, which is where you want to be spending the majority of your time.
The Present
This is the place where happiness lives. When you don’t regret anything in the past and you don’t fear anything in the future.
With those feelings absent, you can be present. The lack of worries, wants, and desires combined creates happiness.
That’s why the first step to spend more time in the present is to let go of the past. (Spend time journaling, with a therapist and reflecting)
There are ways to bring yourself to the present on your own, though.
Of course, meditation is one. Spending time focusing on what is here, now, will bring you here, now.
Don’t worry, that’s not it.
Certain activities are engaging enough that they are meditative. Meditative in the sense that you become completely present.
When I play chess, work out, race go-karts, play guitar or talk with someone engaging, I am fully present.
For you, that might be different activities, though.
You might find it through dance, singing or even a video game. Whatever the activity is, it doesn’t matter.
If it brings you to the present, you let go of all baggage and fear, and you are far more likely to feel happy.
Unfortunately, if you want more than just a moment of happiness, you cannot use an activity to distract you from the baggage. You must let go of the shame and the fear.
That requires a lot of work, but it is worth it, because the present is where you want to be.
This is the ultimate goal.
The Future
To live longer in the present, you need to understand the future - you need to be comfortable with it.
Time is a funny thing, but we won’t get too deeply into that now. Let’s just say this… the future has not yet happened, and the majority of your predictions have been wrong.
How many times has your anxiety played out a scenario in your head over and over again that never ended up happening?
How many times have your fears been completely irrational?
Let’s get one thing straight - Not all fear is useless. Some of it is meant to protect you.
But, spend too much time with that fear, and you will be stuck in the future. Your anxieties will grow, and you will disappear from the present and with that, your happiness.
The best way to come back to the present if you are stuck in the future is to learn to accept that you cannot control the outcome. The only thing you can control is your input.
This is obviously easier said than done, but it is a concept that, if taken seriously, can dramatically improve your mindset.
Let me repeat this.
The only thing you can control is what you do.
If that is all you focus on, naturally, you will come back to the present and stop fearing the future.
Closing Thoughts
Where am I going with all this? How does this affect your happiness in the next 5 years?
Simple.
You need to analyze what is holding you in the past, forgive yourself and others and let go and come back to the present.
You also need to understand that you can’t control the outcome and that the majority of your fears do not come to reality. By doing this, you can come back to the present.
And what happens in the present?
Happiness and freedom.
Thanks for reading